Story Snacks #5

If we have another ice age, kids may start asking Santa to put coal in their stockings.

What if pixie dust is actually pixie dandruff? Would you still dust yourself so you could fly?

Whatever your spiritual beliefs, imagine for just a moment that the opposite is true. If you believe in God, pretend it is a hoax. Those of you who don’t believe in a God, pretend there is a God. If you believe in many gods, imagine there is actually one. Can you even do it? Or do you hold your belief so tightly that you can’t even allow for a second that you could be wrong? In my opinion, one of the biggest problems we face in our world today is certainty. Can you give up your certainty in your beliefs for a few seconds?

I find it frustrating when people say the world is getting worse. “Oh, it’s just this generation.” What about the Crusades? Spanish Inquisition? Roman Empire and the Colosseum? And those are just some of the atrocities we know about. Now I don’t think the world is getting better, and I do think that the earth itself is decaying. But I don’t think humans are getting worse than they used to be. Seems to me like the earliest records describe us treating each other terribly. Without doubt, people are terrible to each other. But as far as we know, it has been that way pretty much since the beginning. Instead of worrying about the world getting worse, think about what you can do to make it better.

“You sure you’re marrying the right person? Lime green is not great for weddings.”
I sigh. “I’m sure. I take it you don’t have socks in that color?”
“No, but I’d be happy to blow chunks on some white ones for you. Might be close.”
My laughter feels a betrayal to my fiancé as I leave to try the next store.

Dog Bear says, “Never microwave bacon. That’s like telling a pig that it’s death was all for nothing.”